Shared Feelings of Now
by UnguidedAngel
Summary: A Taito fic, what feelings are shared during the day Matt decides to leave? R and R please


Okay here we go.. You'll have to give me a chance with this fic, using a Gundam Wing song anyway, but as I was reading the translated lyrics I couldn't help but think of this picture I once saw, Taichi and Yamato standing on the street in the rain, Yama holding his guitar case. If you know who drew that please tell me so I can give credit where it's due. This fic is a Taito fic, that's a shounen ai (boy x boy love), Taichi and Yamato fic. So that's your warning. I don't own Digimon or Gundam Wing, or the translation of Just Communication, this is just for fun, no money will be made (unfortunately) So there's your disclaimer. This is not a crossover fic! I'm just using a song. So read on and enjoy, R & R for me people. 

This is dedicated to anyone who knows about the inner turmoil that this fic is about e.g.. Q. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

'Damn rain, damn people, damn him! How the hell did he think he was going to get away with this?!' The young soccer star thought as he moved to the right to avoid more oncoming people, the rain was starting to sting his eyes, it was times like these he wished that he hadn't gave up his goggles to the newest bearer of courage. But he would not stop running, no matter how many people he ran into or how many times he fell over he was going to catch up to him no matter what. He could feel the cold begin to seep through his green blazer, his shoes were already water clogged. Running through the busy streets of Odaiba was no simple task, so far he had managed to hit eight people, four of them to the floor, but he didn't have enough time to stand there and apologise, he just shouted a quick sorry to them and ran on, hoping that he never would have the displeasure of running into any of them again. That's when he saw him, the figure clouded by sheets of rain but unmistakable from Taichi's point of view, that's when he found his second burst of speed, even if they both had to stand in the middle of the road the blonde was going to talk to him, he couldn't just leave. He shouted, hopefully above the bustle of the street. "Yamato!" 

_Just wild beat communication_

_While being pounded by rain_

_I want to express this unfading passion_

_with my entire body, tonight!_

__

The blonde boy known as 'Matt' to his friends, turned to see the chocolate brown haired boy close in on him. He sighed lightly and let his head drop. 'Damnit Tai.. Why couldn't you just let me go?' . His eyes stayed fixed on the floor, droplets of water, falling infront of his eyes as his right hand kept a tight grip on the guitar case and his right kept an equal grip on his backpack. It only took a few seconds for Taichi's feet to appear within view. He was obviously out of breath 'He ran all the way here just to catch me up?..Fool' Yamato thought before he felt the soft, comforting touch of Taichi's hands upon his shoulders. 'Damnit.. This is why I wanted to leave before you knew.. TK was never good at keeping things like this from Tai.. I should've known better.' The vocalist of the Teenage Wolves only now lifted his eyes to the soaking wet tanned boy infront of him. "What do you want Tai? You'll catch a cold .." He said as calmly as possible, trying to put a restraint on his urges just to say sorry and go back with him. 'Why did he have to come damnit?' Tai's gaze didn't suffer from the glare Yama was trying to give him, he was too used to it by now. "What the hell are you doing?" The brunette asked angrily, still unable to believe that he was just going to leave. "Tai.. Just let me go." Was Yamato's cold response. "No! I will not! I know our relationship hasn't exactly been picture perfect but I'm not going to let you just run away!", the blonde's head dropped once more, "Please Tai just leave-" he was cut short by yet another little outburst from his former leader. "Once more you didn't even have the dignity to tell me you were going Matt! You were just going to up and leave me." He stopped as he realised that the slightly taller boy was shaking, his pale hands trembling against both of the objects he's holding. 

_I held your_

_damp shoulders to warm you._

_Your fingers tremble;_

_what are they seeking?_

"Matt..are you okay?" Taichi asked softly, his anger at the blonde seemingly disappearing and being replaced with concern. "I'm fine Tai.." Was the short reply, the blonde lifting his eyes once more, that defiant look he often saw in the digital world fixed upon his face, one of the many reasons why the brunette had fallen for him. "Don't lie to me Yama.." Through wet bangs Tai could see those blue eyes soften slightly before the glare was strengthened. "I said I'm fine Tai.. I just want to go." Taichi's grip tightened on the slightly smaller frame of Yamato lightly. "Just tell me why you're going.." The guitarist sighed slightly, but was determined not to let his facade drop. "I just am.." Was his response that didn't help anything.. "..Now please just let go of me Tai." Taichi growled , not willing to take that as an answer. "Why do you always have to be so stubborn? All I want to do is help you damnit! You've always been the same. Didn't you care what I'd think if you went? What it'd be like for me? For TK? I bet you never even-" he was quickly cut off by his lover's fist, his guitar case was now on the floor. 

_Even if it's in broken speech,_

_I want you to tell me your pain._

_Pretending that the pain's worn off_

_doesn't make you an adult.___

__

"Don't you dare accuse me of not caring Taichi Kamiya! Don't you dare!" It was like a fire had erupted in Yamato's eyes as he glared at his love. "Don't you ever say I didn't care or consider your feelings Tai! I don't believe you could think that!", Taichi was still stunned, that was the first punch that Matt had given him since the whole Agumon incident. He brought his hand up to the place on his cheek that was starting to ache already. "What was I meant to think? You just up and left! Leaving your brother to tell me. My best friend.. And my lover.. And you still managed to just leave." This time it was the young blonde's turn to growl. Matt was glad for the rain at this particular moment, as it covered his teary eyes, raindrops and teardrops, fell down his face simultaneously melding together as Matt struggled to keep his voice in check. "You think that was easy? You think I don't know that I'm your best friend? You think I don't know how much I love you?" His voice faulted at that last comment. "Damnit Tai.." He said as he recovered, picking his guitar case from the floor. Taichi lifted himself from his stunned stance, placing his hand over Yamato's before he managed to lift the guitar into the air. Their gazes locked for a moment, before Matt yet again broke the stare and moved back a little. "I have to go.." He said sadly, turning in the rain back toward where he was first headed. "It's better this way Taichi.." 

_I want to protect that look in your eyes_

_Believe in the love_

_that can change sadness to strength._

"Please Matt.. You're not going to just give up on us are you? Your band didn't even know you were going, why are you running away from us?" The bearer of courage could feel the tears beginning to form, but he wouldn't be very courageous if he let those tears fall would he? He could see the blonde come to a slow stop, further from the road, his shoulders slumped. "Don't you know what this could do to us Tai? What we could put TK and Kari through?" Taichi slowly walked up to him, the tears fought back for now. "We'd be a laughing stock if everyone found out Tai.. They'd become targets, our friends, our family. I don't want that to happen, so I'm leaving.. Is that a good enough reason for you?" He uttered softly, his back still turned on brunette. When Tai didn't reply, the blue eyed boy turned around. "Tai?" He asked the boy who was still staring at him. "You're afraid? Is that it?" Taichi smiled, and even through the dark sky and heavy rain the area around them seemed to light up, in Yamato's eyes anyway. "Matt.. We can get through it.. We've faced things a lot worse than a few narrow minded people.. Who cares what they think? We're still the same people, and if their opinion of us changes, that's their fault, not ours.." He stepped towards Matt again. "Just come back.. Don't let them chase you away from me again..." All Matt could do was stare back in response. 

_Just wild beat communication_

_Don't be afraid of anything._

_Because noone's going to take away_

_our shared feelings of now._

'Those eyes! Always those damn eyes!' Yamato thought as he watched Taichi approach him again, conflicting thoughts telling him to stay and to go. He knew better than to have Taichi's level of hope in this situation, he knew that he was most likely right, that if anyone in school found out that both he and Taichi would be ruined. Okay.. Maybe not Taichi, he may be gay, but that team wouldn't last three seconds without Tai, everyone knew it. His position was safe, but Matt? How easy is it to replace a pretty face that can sing a few tunes? Very easy. He could feel the same sinking feeling of when he realised how easily he was replaced in the Digital world creep up on him again. If he went it wouldn't make a difference. He could be easily replaced, by Tai in most cases, well the more important places, a brother for TK, a son for his parents, an idol in school. Most roles Matt plays, he can be replaced in by Tai. "Matt?" The blonde blinked and looked over to the young soccer player again. "What were you thinking about?" That was one role he couldn't be replaced in, not by Tai anyway, a best friend and lover. "Huh?..Oh.. Nothing." He lifted his water ridden arm up to check the time. "I'm going to miss my train Tai.. I have to go." Taichi shook his head, he thought that maybe Matt would decide to stay after talking to him, but he was obviously wrong. He was losing his angel "Can you please just tell me where you're going?" 

_Just wild beat communication_

_While being pounded by rain_

_I want to express this unfading passion_

_with my entire body, tonight!_

"That would defeat the object of me leaving a little wouldn't it Tai?" Was Matt's light hearted response, god only knows how he managed to have such a light-hearted tone in such a dark moment of his life. The hurt was so apparent in Taichi's eyes, how much the blonde just wanted to walk over there and place a soft reassuring kiss on those sweet lips. Just one kiss, just to tell him that when he was gone everything would be okay.. But he had the oddest feeling that it wouldn't work. He was startled when he felt Tai's grip on his hand tighten a little 'Since when was he holding my hand?' He glanced back up to Tai who seemed to have realised that Matt hadn't even noticed that he had took his hand. "What was it you said..? Just in case I get scared? It's about time I returned the favour." Taichi said warmly. The blonde blinked once again "You remember that?" He asked quietly, trying to stop himself from smiling, he was meant to be leaving. The brunette just nodded gently and stepped forward once more, wrapping his arms around the equally soaked boy and pulling him into a tight embrace. "Please don't leave me Yama.. I love you.. I need you." 

_I want to spend the night_

_nestled close to you until the faraway dawn._

_We can lose everything else,_

_as long as we don't lose tenderness._

Hearing Taichi's softly spoken words Yamato closed his eyes. "I.. I have to Tai.." His mouth struggled to say the words, that he truly didn't want to say, but they had to be said, he had to leave. He could feel Tai shake his head gently, that brown, relentless torrent of hair must've been flattened by now, pressing against that soft tanned face. 'Damnit Ishida! Get a grip!' The blonde scolded himself. He pulled himself to arms length of Taichi, his blue eyes locking once again with Tai's brown depths. 'He's been crying..' The blonde thought to himself. "I'm sorry Tai.. I never meant to cause you so much pain.." The brunette's eyes narrowed lightly.. "And you thought leaving me would do what precisely?" Was the angered response that Yamato got, he tilted his head away as if he was trying to shield himself from the harshness of it. ".. I.. I didn't think y-" before his sentence was finished Taichi had managed to break his soft hold. "Yeah.. You didn't think. Maybe you thought I'd be better off that way? Was that it?" Yamato looked up once more, startled by how viscously Taichi was speaking to him. "Well that isn't the case Matt.. No matter how much you want to believe differently.. My life would not be worth living without you..". Matt was too stunned to move as Tai stepped forward, cupping his face gently, droplets of water falling between them as Taichi initiated the soft kiss, his lips gently managing to caress that of the blonde. The brunette watched as his Yama's eyes widened a little before his body relaxed and gave in to the sweet kiss. The blondes hands moved gracefully to Tai's sides as the kiss deepened. They could both feel the rain dropping onto them, running down their faces. Yamato was the first to break the kiss, bringing his finger to Tai's lips to silence him before anymore words were spoken. 

_Through kisses, more than words,_

_we feel each other's heartbeats,_

_drawing passion near;_

_momentary, yet eternal..._

The blonde continued to stare at Taichi silently. The rain still pelted them from all sides and Matt could feel his fingers starting to go numb. 'I love you Taichi..' He thought about the young angel infront of him, angel? Tai? He mentally chuckled, a small smile playing on his lips. He wasn't sure which would hurt him most, to go and think about being able to touch him but for it to never happen, or, to stay and watch how everyone would torment them, watch his fearless, brave warrior Taichi eventually be broken down. Either way he was pretty much miserable. Why couldn't he ever make up his mind? He just wanted to offer the other boy some kind of protection, some kind of safety. By leaving? Yeah.. By leaving. It was the only way he could make sure that Tai wouldn't get hurt because of him ever again. Taichi was staring back at the paler boy, he could see the confusion on his face. Oh how Tai wanted to kiss him again, he wanted that comfort, he needed it, even if to Yamato it was just a desperate plea from him to stay, he wanted to do it again. "Matt? Matt are you okay?" He called out to him, the boy shook his head in response. The confusion had grown. "I don't know anymore." He said, shaking his head slightly. "I don't know Tai.." He looked up at him then, his eyes full of tears, the people around them were just as oblivious to them as they were to the people. The tears were obvious, but Matt being Matt wouldn't let them fall, not even infront of Tai, though he had done so before. This time he had to be strong. 

_I want to gaze at you, painfully, intensely._

_You're so precious to me_

_it almost brings me to tears._

"Matt.." Taichi said quietly, stepping forward tentatively. "Listen to me.. I know you.. I know what you're feeling. We've been there for eachother before.. Why can't we now? We don't have to tell the others or let them know.. We don't even have to tell your parents if you want. TK and Kari know and that's what's important right? I just want you to come back with me.. I don't like goodbyes.. And I never thought _you'd_ be leaving me.. You promised me you wouldn't ever leave me!" The tears had broken out onto Tai's face once more. "You promised me.." He stared at Matt, not wiping his eyes. "Please don't give up on us.. On me." The blonde shook his head. "Don't cry Tai.. Tears don't help anything." Matt moved to pick up his guitar case again. "I never made that promise with the intent of breaking it.. I wish I didn't have to.." Tai growled once more, stepping forward and clasping both of Yamato's hands between his own. "You _don't_ have to Yama.." 

_Just wild beat communication_

_Don't surrender anything,_

_because when you have someone who understands you,_

_you can fight on._

Matt's eyes were locked on their hands, together like they had been on many an occasion before this, but this time it was different, this time Matt's conscience told him it had to be the last. "Tai.." He said softly, no matter how much his conscience told him he had to pull those hands away, they felt wanted, needed there. He didn't want them to move, he wished Tai just took him home now, while he couldn't let his pride stop him from admitting that Tai was right. He lifted his eyes slightly, pulling one hand free from the small embrace and gently brushed his fingers over Taichi's skin, he could feel Tai's hand wrapping around it once more as he brought it to his lips, kissing it softly. Matt smiled gently at him. "Please Yama.. Let's go back. None of us would be the same without you." A small note of mischief was in the brunettes eyes. 

_Just wild beat communication_

_Don't let go of love_

_Unleash all of the complexities of your heart, and show me_

_your true self, overflowing and passionate, tonight!_

The blonde couldn't help but smile openly, lifting his hand to gently bat the boy away. "You're not funny Taichi.." The shorter boy chuckled gently, lifting the guitar case and holding it for his returned angel. He quickly hooked his free arm under Matt's newly freed arm. The blonde cast him a playful glare. "Don't you ever think of leaving me again!" The brunette scolded as the other boy looked down, the both of them trudging through the rain, on their way back to Taichi's apartment. "You're never going to let this go now are you Taichi?" The blonde asked, knowing that this incident will be what Tai uses to win all their arguments in the future. "Darn straight I'm not.." Tai smirked as he continued to lead both the soaked boys through the streets. 

_Just wild beat communication_

_Don't be afraid of anything._

_Because noone's going to take away_

_our shared feelings of now._

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

Owari... Well that was a lot less violent than my other fics don't you think? But I think that 'Just Communication' goes well with a Taito fic. Tell me what you thought of this, flame me if you want.. I'm always up for a laugh. 

~ The Unguided Angel. 


End file.
